The body does not react well to stress.Feeling sexy usually isn’t one of them. Stress at work, home, or in relationships can happen to anyone. Learning how to handle it in a healthy way really helps. You can do a lot of it yourself, and a counselor or doctor can also help.
2. Partner Problems
Sexual desire requires two to tango. Both partners need to feel connected and women especially need the feeling of being close. Poor communications, a sense of betrayal, lack of trust, and repeated fighting and criticism may create a relationship that lacks closeness and intimacy. Counseling may be the answer if couples find that the issues are too tough to resolve on their own.
Alcohol is usually not the answer to any problem. While alcohol may decrease inhibitions, it also decreases sexual performance and libido. Your partner may not appreciate a drunken advance and may be turned off by it. Alcohol is an addictive drug and you may need help to quit.
4. Too Little Sleep
If your sexual get-up-and-go is gone, maybe you’re not getting enough sleep. Do you go to bed too late or rise too early? Do you have a sleep problem like trouble falling or staying asleep, or a condition such as sleep apnea? Anything that messes with a good night’s rest can mess with sex. Fatigue saps sexy feelings. Work on your sleep habits, and if that doesn’t help, talk to your doctor.
5. Having Kids
Being a parent is a full-time job and you need to carve out time without a child or baby around. Planning quiet time for intimacy and sexual desire may require some creative thinking, like having sex when the baby naps, or hiring a babysitter so mom and dad can have a play date.
6. Medication :
Some drugs can turn down desire. They include some of these types of medications:
- Blood pressure medications
- Birth control pills (some studies show a link; others don’t)
- Anti-HIV drugs
If this is the cause, your doctor may be able to suggest a medication alternative that might have fewer side effects.
7. Poor Body Image :
Feeling sexy is easier if you like how you look. Work on accepting your body as it is today, even if you’re working to get in shape. Feeling good about yourself can put you in the mood. If your partner has low esteem, assure them that they’re sexy.
Obesity affects one-third of all Americans and being overweight can limit desire because of decreased sexual enjoyment, lack of performance, and poor self-esteem. How you feel about yourself goes a long way in affecting how you enjoy sex. Counseling may be helpful.
9. Erection Problems:
Men with ED (erectile dysfunction) often worry about how they will be able to perform sexually, and that worry can drain their desire. ED can be treated, and couples can also work to keep it from affecting their relationship.
10. Low T:
The “T” hormone, testosterone, fuels sex drive. As men age, their T levels may drop a bit. Not all lose the desire for sex as this happens, but some do. Many other things — from relationships to weight — also affect a man’s sex drive and testosterone levels, so there’s not a one-size-fits-all answer for every man.
11. Depression :
Depression affects all facets of life including sex drive. Losing pleasure in daily activities often requires treatment including counseling and perhaps medication. Unfortunately, some antidepressants also depress libido. Your doctor and therapist need to know if low sex drive is one of your symptoms of depression.
For many women, sex drive dims around menopause.Menopause may cause physical changes that affect intercourse, including vaginal dryness and pain with intercourse (dyspareunia). Treatments are available to enhance sexual desire and function after menopause.
14. Lack of Closeness:
Making love is more than just sex. Intimacy and closeness are important part of a healthy love life. If sexual desire is waning, it may be time to inject romance back into the relationship. Snuggling, giving each other massages, and spending casual time together may help ignite that spark.